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Gettin' Through the Grief Stuff...

Posted by: Corry Roach on 3/29/2011

Grief and its process is all about honouring that gaping hole inside us that causes loneliness and pain as it awaits our higher learning spiritually. It sets us on a journey of discovery if we allow it to happen. Our bodies will keep giving us signals until we awaken to the Truth of our discomfort. It’s either the pebble in our shoe as we walk the smooth path, or it’s the rock on the road that we stumble over, that lets us know we need to address our painful unfinished business in this life. We can do something about it and we can joyfully survive that confrontation in order to become spiritually peaceful in a world that is often rife with so much hardship…


There is one thing I must add, however. Readiness is imperative, timing is everything, you have to want it and stay working at it once you’ve begun the journey. After all, “Thy will be done...”, and then I must add, “…and in Thine own time!”


I recall the late Dr. Gregg Furth, my drawings analysis mentor, who would quietly say, when some therapists were reluctant to delve into their own psyche, “Comfort the disturbed, and disturb the comfortable.” Hence I’ve come to grudgingly accept some new issue when it invariably lands in my life like a cow pie, right when I’m starting to enjoy the peace I’ve had for just a short while…I’ve come to identify these things over the years as part of the natural rhythms of life and its transformation.


It’s also taken all this time for me to fully appreciate the late Dr. Elisabeth Kubler Ross’ comment, “My dear, you must take the shit in your life and turn it into fertilizer!” Thanks to her, I have a unique appreciation for the many beautiful things in my life, from the beauty of where my home is situated on a lake in nature, to the wonderful people and experiences in my life that continually remind me how blessed I am, and how endless are the opportunities to grow.


In the last months, there have been many hardships that have touched my life, simply because I am engaged with people I care about. I have long since quit blaming God for these painful places, and instead, like accidentally sitting down on a cactus thorn, I’ve learned to appreciate how swiftly these events have encouraged my movement forward! I have come to see these events as metaphors that I need to dissect and learn from, so that I might break my heart open at even deeper levels and lay my heart open before God, so I might evolve still further as a result of my being a student of Life’s many fine teachers.


Make no mistake, my appreciation has not always been immediate, and I’ve wept and raged against how life can be so unfair.

And there you have it; Life is unfair, and it has never pretended to be anything else. I don’t know anyone who has touched my life, who has somehow not ever had their share of  pain and grief to deal with, although not everyone has been able to embrace the deeper meaning of these occurrences. After all, one must get better instead of bitter, and one must get stronger in the broken places. Time, and what we do with that time, does work its way into healing and forgiveness.


I encourage us all to awaken and be conscious and present for the visit of healing, so our journey for spiritual peace can begin with full intention. I ask that we all commit to becoming a part of that greater determination for world peace and spiritual harmony, from the world within each of us to the world without.


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 Recent Comments


I look forward to reading your thoughts on men and grief and will share how it strikes me.

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